You don't admire yourself

And how to start today

“Who do you admire?”

Whenever we are asked, we always choose someone else. We never dare to answer, "myself."

We feel guilty and afraid that people will think we are conceited for admiring ourselves.

That's very wrong.

It is difficult for us to admire ourselves because we lack self-love and believe that admiration comes from outside. That's why we focus on earning people's admiration and anchor our self-worth to that supposed admiration.

That's foolish.

It's foolish because you are trying to control something that is beyond your control.

It's foolish because it enslaves you. If everything you do is for the fame and admiration of your "fans," you will live trapped by their expectations.

External admiration goes up, down, comes and goes, grows, and fades away. It is mercenary, disloyal, and opportunistic. It's a smoke mirror that reflects only what you want to see.

It's better to train yourself to admire yourself.

The trick is to train yourself to admire the parts of you that are chaos and imperfection, not just the parts that are finished products.

• Train yourself to admire your process more than your outcome.

• Train yourself to admire what you learn more than what you achieve.

The next time someone asks you who you admire, proudly say, "myself," and believe it.